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The Marriage Puzzle

August 22, 2013

Marriage is like putting a puzzle together. The more we grow together the more each piece of the puzzle comes together.  The question is, are you adding the pieces to your marriage puzzle or taking them away by what you are currently doing?  Are they the right or wrong ones? When we add the wrong pieces we force them together or try to make them fit.  Wrong move!!!  This is when troubles begin. The puzzle looks strange and senseless. Have you ever put together a puzzle and tried to force the pieces together? Of course not! Because you know if the pieces don’t fit then the puzzle won’t look the way it is supposed to.

As we journey through our marriage we try to find the correct pieces that will form a beautiful picture.  Sometimes we search for the right pieces when they are actually right in front of us the whole time. Many times we seem to be hunting in faraway places, asking others, reading books, and seeking advice from our friends. We try to figure our marriage out our own way but this never works.

King David believed he could have a wonderful time and not hurt anyone. One day he saw a beautiful woman taking a bath and he wanted her. David knew what he wanted but what was he thinking? He wasn’t! We all act before we think and that gets us into big trouble. Many times we think of our own needs and what we want. David was being selfishly. He was married and if that was not enough he had a one night stand with Bathsheba. Big mistake! She got pregnant! Something David was not expecting. David ends up killing Uriah, Bathsheba’s husband. Wrong move? Then he marries Bathsheba. I don’t have time to finish the life of David but it can be found in 2 Samuel 11 through the end of the Book. What does David’s life have to do with marriage? When we decide to work our marriage out our way we run into trouble. We call this type of behavior selfishness or self-centeredness. There are a few words in the English language that would make life a lot more easier if they were not there. O well! Many times selfishness takes front stage in our marriage.     

The problem is that we have our priorities all mixed up. Let God work things out in the first place! He has the picture of the puzzle already finished. God is just waiting for us to get our priorities together. Our priorities usually pertain to our wants and needs. If we ask most people how you would find success. They would name-the right job, plenty of money, a home that is the best on the block, and healthy children as their top priorities. We have a problem Houston! Our first question must be “Where do we rank God and our Marriage?” We have forgotten the two main ingredients in the mix. If you put God first and your marriage next everything else will fall in place. That’s right! Try it you’ll like it.

There is no perfect marriage and we all go through struggles, but without God in your marriage the picture will be incomplete. I know many of us have taken a puzzle piece that didn’t quit fit and forced it. We do the same with marriage if we try to manage it on our own and don’t allow Christ to take control of it. It is true that some marriages without God may be ok. But if you are looking for a complete and well rounded marriage that has total commitment and intimacy, God has to be your main priority.

There is no way you can wholly solve your marriage issues without the help and knowledge of Jesus Christ. In Ephesians 3:20 it says, “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen! We read in Ecclesiastes 4:12, “A cord of three stands is not quickly broken.” 

I challenge you to put God first in your life and marriage. I challenge every couple and individual that passes through our doors at “The Bridge Counseling and Coaching” to embrace God as the top priority of their marriage or life. The ones that put God first in their life and marriage are happier, their problems are not as enormous, and life is much fuller.  Make God your third strand today!  What are you waiting for!!!  Who is first in your life or marriage?

Ron Smart
Certified Christian Life Coach
The Bridge Counseling and Coaching

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